Ronald McDonald Charged with Nuclear Theft

This happened in Scotland.

Wildfires Trap Travelers in Chicken!

Okay, not in a real chicken, but in Chicken, Alaska.

Sliced Cheese: Motorcycles Cut Rescue Time

Rescue workers in Miami-Dade County have begun using souped-up BMW motorcycles to zip in and out of Miami rush hour traffic that would stop normal emergency vehicles.

After hearing of Miami's success, California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger decided to upgrade his state's emergency response vehicles to make them more effective in traffic. The governor, who said that motorcycles are "for wimps," has authorized the use of "emergency monster trucks" to "run right over those namby-pamby little girly cars" that get in the way of emergency vehicles.

Cows

Did you know that California produces the most milk?

Spider-Man 2: Better Than the First

This is certainly good news, since we think the first one was already very good.

Exercise: A Depression Cure?

Well, this scientist thinks so, at least for "milder forms of depression."

The Jeopardy King

A man from Salt Lake City is making some moolah on Jeopardy! He has won 17 times already. I wonder how many more times he'll win and what he'll do with his $500,000+ winnings so far?

Melted Cheese: How Not to Kill a Spider

I killed spiders this way several times while living in South America, but I was living in a dirt-floor house made of cement blocks that wasn't likely to burn down...

Oregon's Sidewalk-Blocking Ban

Don't try and set up a lemonade stand here.

Rotting Cheese: Indiana's Mountain

Randolph Farms Landfill could become the highest point in Indiana if a proposed expansion is approved.

The site was initially considered as the backdrop for the closing scenes of The Lord of the Rings. It's not hard to imagine Frodo and Sam braving the stinking vapors of Mt. Doom (or, in this case, Mt. Dung), casting the Ring into the mountain of trash where it dissolves into the icky scum, never to be seen again.

T.H.E.M.

Totally Hidden Extreme Magic is a great new hidden camera show on NBC. I hope they are able to keep coming up with new ideas, seems like it would be a challenge.

Irish Anti-Polygamy Law 'Racist'?

Remember back in the 1800s, when polygamy was, well, frowned upon, and the Mormon pioneers were persecuted when they practiced it? Well, times have changed. If not in the U.S., at least in Ireland. Muslim immigrants who have tried to bring their plural wives and children from each marriage with them to Ireland have run up against Ireland's anti-polygamy law, similar to laws in other countries. Now, the Irish Council for Civil Liberties has said the law is religious discrimination and should be illegal. Go figure.

Fishy Jello

This aquarium treat is sure fishy.

Moose Cheese... Really

With a blog like ours, how could we ignore this odd news? Farmers in northern Sweden are now selling moose cheese for about $500 a pound. The farm attracts 25,000 visitors a year.

New Name for Food Stamps

The U.S. government wants to give food stamps a new name after phasing out paper coupons in favor of plastic cards that work like ordinary credit cards. "Americans can suggest a new name -- or argue to keep the current one -- until Aug. 23." We suggest a name change to either "The National Supplement for Improved Sustenance and Alimentation for the Disadvantaged and Undernourished Program," or the more simple "CrediChow." Any ideas?

Moldy Cheese: Let It Go Day

Today is Let It Go Day. It's a good idea to point that out to your angry coworker/spouse/friend etc. who is still holding a grudge. But it's a bad idea to say the name of the day to your 4-year-old during a long car trip who is trying hard to 'hold it.'

Astronomers Discover New Molecules

Two new tiny molecules have been discovered in an interstellar cloud of gas and dust at the center of our galaxy. The two molecules are made up of only 8 and 10 atoms each and are 26,000 light years from Earth. How is it possible for astronomers to detect something so small and so far away? Nobody knows, but the scientists have named the miniscule molecules "we-made-this-up-ium" and "haha-thats-a-good-one-ium."

The Big Cheese: A 'Muscle Man Toddler'

"Not yet 5, he can hold seven-pound weights with arms extended, something many adults cannot do." Unfortunately, doctors are worried he may suffer heart problems when older.

Clinton is a 'Good Storyteller'

Apparently lots of people are buying Clinton's book despite its bad reviews. This article points out that even people "who don't like him still grudgingly admit that he's interesting...or that he's a good storyteller." I would point out that being a "good storyteller" is one of the reasons that people don't like him. After all, he has told America more than a few fables in his day.

Over-Aged Cheese: Top Movie Tunes

Okay, so they had a good choice for number one... but the rest? I had hoped for more animated tunes in the top ten. I think they focused just a little too much on ancient musicals.

America's Most Stolen Vehicles

Well, I own one of these cars, although I won't say which one, I don't want anyone stealing it...

Green Cheese: Microsoft's Human Keyboard

Microsoft has patented a weird, futuristic method of using human skin as a virtual keyboard.

When is a Panther Not a Panther?

When it's a house cat. But a very big house cat.

Stale Cheese: Last Comic Standing

Two comics went head to head last night at the end of NBC's Last Comic Standing. The way the competition was presented led us to believe that the two comics were about equal: they got the same number of laughs. However, after the audience's vote was counted, we were told that 94% of the people who were actually there voted for the same comic. Now, why was the show edited to make us wonder who would be tossed off even though it would have been extremely obvious had we been allowed to see the whole performance?

Cheesy Environmental Quiz

Test your environmental knowledge with this quiz.